Day Twelve
Thrifty - Skillful
Proverbs 31:19...She lays her hand to the spindle and her hands hold the distaff...
This Ladies Devotional was birthed from two sources: 1) a study in Dakes Anotated Reference Bible, which lists 31 characteristics of the Proverbs 31 woman, and 2) by watching our daughter, Rachael, grow and mature into God's call on her life. On the beginning page it reads, "I would like to dedicate this devotional to my daughter and friend, Rachael Ann Frye. Of all the many women that I know, her heart best exemplifies and portrays the Proverbs 31 woman." I did not do this just because she is my daughter, although that would be reason enough. But I dedicated it to her because I have watched her consistently maturing into a woman of God. And the fruit is the many blossoming attributes of the Proverbs 31 woman, with thriftiness and skillfulness being strongly evident. These qualities have grown in her through submission and obedience to God's will.
There is a saying, "The apple doesn't fall far from the tree." One of the examples of living life that Rachael was given was watching a mother struggle daily with suicidal manic depression/bi-polar disorder, post traumatic stress disorder, anxiety attacks and the onset of agoraphobia, which is the fear of public places. We called ourselves a Christian home, but lived in constant fear, hopelessness and defeat. Consequently, while Rachael was in college, she was also diagnosed with manic depression/bi-polar disorder, and began walking the same path that I was on. However, God, in His mercy, intervened one day and brought physical, mental and emotional healing to our home. Some say it was just a hormone change; some say it was only a season we were going through. But we knew, and those around us knew that God had indeed wrought a miracle, setting us free from years of bondage, anger and emotional instability.
As I was working on this particular day's devotional (2002), the scripture in the Gospel of Luke kept coming to mind...Jesus said to him, no one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back (to the things behind) is fit for the Kingdom of God...(Luke 9:62). Jesus spoke this in response to people who said they wanted to follow Him, but made excuses as to why they couldn't do it just yet. The walk of being a disciple of Christ is again, about appropriate focus...His will over ours.
When the Lord brought healing to our home, we did not automatically begin to walk as super Christians, with no problems or worries. On the contrary, we realized that something had to change in the cycles of behavior and responses that we were so used to walking in. I had spent many years in counseling with psychiatrists, psychologists, support groups, therapy, taking all types of medications, reading books and trying to educate myself on depression and dealing with the hurts of my past. Bottom line - I became obsessed with looking back, which developed into a cycle of dysfunction in our family. But by seeking God and His will for our lives and through His Word, He taught us how to lay down the old, to not keep looking back, learn to walk in emotional health and allow Him to strip away what is not pleasing to Him.
The premise of the scripture in Luke is that when we choose to walk as a disciple of Christ, we walk forward, not back...Rachael was 'primed', so to speak, to live a life of looking back because that is what she heard, what she was taught and what she knew. She was 'primed', so to speak, to teach her children the same walk of fear and defeat. But when God healed us, He set us on a new path and the choice now lie before us. Were we going to continue in what we knew, or walk by faith in what God wanted for us?
Because Paul and I travel with his job, we now live (2002) about 11 hours away from Rachael, so we talk much by telephone. There are days when I have heard tiredness in her voice from dealing with 3 children - ages 4 1/2, 3 and 15 months. I have heard impatience in her voice when one of the girls was pushing and challenging her to get their way. I have heard hurt in her voice when she has experienced rejection from someone who walked away from her because she took a stand in the Lord. I have heard struggle in her voice when she was dealing with the desire to give up and not press through in prayer and faith. I have also heard victory and strength in her voice as God brought the answer, right on time. And all along the way, she has continued to walk forward and not 'look back' at the examples and cycles she was taught - to allow circumstances or emotions to defeat her.
Today, Paul and I watch with joy as Rachael and her husband, Gerald, raise their children in a home centered on God's will. They teach them the Word of God, they teach them how to worship and pray, they even teach them how to fast. Recently, when an important event was approaching, she felt led to fast. So, because the whole family would be involved, this fast included Madison (4 1/2) and Hannah (3). At their young age, they fasted their little videos. And Madison knew that they were doing it for Jesus! I have literally watched Rachael teach her girls, during difficult times, to press on through and call on the Lord. Now, this is breaking the cycle of looking back!! Yes, there are hard days. Anyone with children understands that some days are tremendously trying. But we have a choice before us - to believe that God has the answer no matter what the problem is, or to look back at something more familiar, which continues the cycles in our lives. If you look back...you will be lured back!
The principal of the scripture in Luke is that once we made the choice (putting our hands to the plow) to serve God completely, we then allow Him to change us, mold us, and renew our minds, to make us reflections of His Son. The fruit of walking forward and not looking back is the unfolding characteristics and traits of God, which brings hope to those who desperately need to see that God has the answer for them no matter what problems they are facing.
Not that I have attained [this ideal], or have already been made perfect, but I press on to lay hold of (grasp) and make my own, that for which Christ Jesus (the Messiah) has laid hold of me and made me His own...I do not consider, brethren, that I have captured and made it my own [yet]; but one thing I do [it is my one aspiration]; forgetting what lies behind and straining forward to what lies ahead...I press toward the goal to win the (supreme and heavenly) prize to which God in Christ Jesus is calling us upward...(Philippians 3:12-14).
I press forward!!!!!!
The following is an email I received from Rachael, called 'Full Moon'...
"Okay, took the girls to WalMart last night. I had Jonathan too, so you know I'm pretty occupied. I just make sure the girls stay with me and keep checking things off my list. Well, I am looking for hand soap. I see they have an Equate brand for 87cents. Cool, always need a bargain. Out of the corner of my eye, I see a lapse in my daughter's judgment. Madison has decided that her underwear needs adjusting. So, she does what most kids would do...she pulls her pants and underwear down in the aisle to do some adjusting. When I quit laughing, I had to explain that we don't pull our pants down in WalMart! We finished our shopping and left without further incident...happily!"
Psalm 119:90a...Your Faithfulness is from generation to generation...
A hearts' cry...Father, help me to have eyes of faith, that You stand in front of me and there is provision through Your Son...